Dying Art of Healthy Discussion

According to Cambridge English dictionary, a discussion is an activity in which people talk about something and tell each other their ideas or opinions. Opinion in turn has been defined as a view or judgment formed about something, not necessarily based on fact or knowledge. Opinions therefore are bound to vary from person to person, especially when they are not informed by sound knowledge or based upon universally accepted facts. Discussions tend to degenerate into arguments when people behave in a dogmatic manner and unfortunately with rising intolerance and impatience in general every discussion faces that challenge.

To be able to speak your mind is very challenging, especially when the majority of the people have a similar opinion. I do not know whether people agree with each other because they are being polite or they really have an independent opinion on the matter. I find myself most of the time on the side of the minority on most of the issues, a minority that has made a virtue out of silence, out of non-confrontation and avoiding potential disharmony. These are the times when I realise that the majority does not have to be patently aggressive to articulate their view point, they just have to be numerically superior. Most tend to get intimidated by the force of collective opinion and start to find faults with their own judgment thus further depleting the numbers who hold a different view than the majority. Then there are those who have their own axe to grind and thus consider it wise and advisable not to share their viewpoint. They hide behind the lame logic of "nothing would have changed even if we had spoken our mind". The point i am trying to make is that it is extremely difficult to be able to articulate your viewpoint if it happens to be different from what most of the people in a given set of circumstances hold.

I have found the same kind of lunatic intensity with both liberals and not so liberals when it comes to guarding what they believe is correct, both sides exhibit the same intolerance and condescending attitude towards their ideological opponents. One comes across very few instances where people are really open minded and hear the other person out fully and patiently and try to understand their perspective.
Most people are different in their behavior with different people, which is not so unnatural and surprising. The surprising bit is the expectation of uniform opinion out of these varied interactions being played out in absolutely different and unrelated paradigms. At the most, similar opinion about a particular person, object or instance necessarily implies similarity of interest of both people holding opinions and about which the opinion is held in case it happens to be a human being or an instance. We mistake this similarity of opinion as an evidence of the absolute truthfulness of our own belief because it is being validated by others. We completely forget to notice who these others are, they are people who have almost similar backgrounds and similar interests and will in all probability therefore have views like ours.

It is very rare to have a wholesome discussion where all participants treat each other with equal respect not necessarily approving of each others' viewpoints and opinions, but have enough maturity to understand and grant without grudging each other equal space to articulate their view points. One person's right could be the next person's wrong and vice versa, and therefore it is imperative that we might disagree with each other but can't under no circumstance grudge each other's right that too an equal one to speak their mind. One has to guard against crushing other's opinions howsoever insignificant one might think they are, under the weight of one's education, accomplishment, stature or success. Without realising one tends to acquire a patronising tone when one puts oneself higher up in the intellectual hierarchy in a given gathering and most actually do get intimidated or unsure about themselves and their opinions.

I have seen very few discussions which proceed on pure logic and strength of argument, whether in a living room, conferences or TV studios. People on the basis of who they are and more importantly, who they are perceived as in popular imagination tend to have an upper hand and the last word without the strength of logic and arguments being on their sides necessarily.